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Sitting in an empty room, doing nothing, Just write

I never was an artist per se. I never was an avid reader neither. But one day, it started to slowly change. I became interested in new ideas, became a better reader. Instead of reading words, I was reading an entire work with passion.

With time, sharing my ideas and thoughts was a good relief for me to better communicate and to summarize new ideas just discovered. Now, I want to focus on better organizing those ideas.

These days, it seems like everybody want an opinion out of you, within seconds. In a face-to-face discussion, on social media, by text message, by phone, etc. But I'm a slow thinker, I just can't answer straight up without considering multiple angles at first.

What is more scary for somebody trying to be creative than a blank page? I'm having this issue since a few months, being unable to focus on writing for myself or for this blog. All that empty space creates anxiety in my will to express what I want to tell others.

It's exactly as there is too much noise around at a party and I can't talk. Can't focus, can't structure ideas, can't create.

What I need is:

I read books and articles daily, ideas are not the problems. But the way to express is really the issue I believe.

This brings me to the fact that this blog goes in all directions sometimes. I need to refocus on few subjects that I can handle and for which I have a high interest.

What I want to talk about:

Obviously, those 3 main categories can expand on topics. But I started to think to regroup articles in those three categories and clean up even further the number of articles.

In a world filled with iPads and where the web is becoming less used (not the Internet, but the web as such), it is difficult to imagine that the creative side of each of us is developing. Because it must be said, creating is very different than consuming. An iPad makes it difficult to create content, emancipate oneself, write and reflect on what one experiences and sees while participating in a world that is already saturated with content. Already, it seems to me that the time is running out to read, consult, participate in everything I see on the web. And if we add to that the will to create, how can we navigate?

First, you have to see the problem. What I have already diagnosed.

Then comes the time to find solutions to better manage your time of discussion with the world through various tips. And also better appreciate it.

The problem? I like to read everything that interests me on the Internet, I like to write on my blog or by replying to articles, but I don't like racking my brains in order to have to write because the inspiration is not there. And writing 2-line texts is, in my opinion, not creating.

The solution? Better organize your time and focus on your goals.

To organize your time better?

To focus on your objectives

All this is only a (very) brief summary of the first points of what the ebook named Focus is trying to show you.

Sitting in an empty room, doing nothing

As an experimentation, I am typing this with my eyes closed, in a meditative state, in total silence. Good thing I know my typing. What I want to prove is that it is almost impossible for me to sit in an empty room and do nothing, like the old quote from Blaise Pascal. Even meditating, I have an hard time to focus on my breath and give up on the other thoughts. I constantly need to be connected, and that's a problem. The pseudo-stress it implies is stating to eat me alive.

I need to slow down.

Stop thinking.

Stop trying.

Stop wanting to know everything.

Stop reading.

Stop watching.

Stop pretending to do something.

Start to be quiet in an empty room, with myself, while meditating.

One of the big actor in this problematic is technology. It creates so much distractions in the name of progress. I used to laugh at people using old stuff, old monotasking technology, like a bank book to keep track of their spendings and earnings. Now, I feel like that was to the point, more meaningful, less stressful.

I feel like to get rid of my smartphone, my computer, all screens. My work relies on them though, so it is quite difficult. But, even at work, I am distracted and overwhelmed by my need to read/watch/learn something new every single minute of my waking hours.

I aspire to be a better person. Not by improving every aspects of my life, not to be more productive, not to be wealthier, but by slowing down and to be more centered on what really matters: family and nature.

I want to regain my mental sanity, to be fully conscient of my mind and thoughts.

Just write

What if each day, I take time to open an empty notepad file and start typing whatever I feel like to type at this very moment?

It will end up with a lot of words, loosely connected together, but it might also create reflections of the state of my mind, it might help me to focus and see clearly.

Similarly, I used to do field notes and I might start again soon.

From now on, I will take just 5-10 minutes every day to type. The process will be simple:

Goal isn't to become a writer or to impress anyone. I simply want to have a clearer mind, a mind that doesn't think all the time, a mind that can pause and just be.

Today, I woke up around 7am, as always since few weeks. I have to say that having 2 young kids is tough. The second one, only a month old, doesn't sleep the full night yet and I struggle with that. My mood is highly affected.

I have gratitude to be in relationship with someone that I love very much. She is awesome with kids. Me, I'm not perfect at all. My temper is short sometimes, I'm working to improve it sooner than later.

What I like about having kids is it slows you down while stressing you out at the same time because everything is urgent. Weird feeling, but it helped me question even more my relation with time and life in general. Per example, no longer I want to stress about work, responsabilities and other daily tasks. Biking to work is a great example. Even if it takes more time, more effort, more planning, I enjoy every single second out of it. Even more than before. Because it is rewarding, it is like going back in time, during my childhood, where time was just a thing for adults to place benchmarks on their life. As a kid, you don't care, you just enjoy every bit of life.

This brings me at the realization that we, adults, want to much, all the time. We want to improve, we want to squeeze more of the day, we want productivity, we want more money, we want fame, we want better cars, better house, better neighbours, better sex.

What if each day, I take time to realize that I don't need much?

I can vastly do it by opening a blank file and start typing my feelings.